a hotel manager called the police and told them a man was stuck in the swimming pool. when police arrived it was far from what they expected. a mans penis was stuck in the suction hole. the hotel manager shut off the suction but the mans penis had swollen so bad it was stuck. the police finally were able to remove the mans penis from the suction hole. one officer said "well he wont be rubbing his backside for a while."
dispatcher: 911 what is your emergency?
caller: i need some dope
Dispatcher:excuse me?
caller: ya me and my girlfriend... um we need some dope.
dispatcher:sir this is the sheriffs department
caller:oh ****
[click]
Dispatcher: 911 emergency or fire?
Caller: emergency you see i'm with four people in a hotel but theres only two towels
dispatcher:isn't that something you need to ask the hotel manager?
[click]
Dispatcher: 911 what is your emergency?
Caller:some man came into my house and stoll my meth.
Dispatcher:alright:i'll send someone over there right away.
when police got there the women said oh its ok he returned it you can leave now.
Dispatcher:911 do you need an ambulance or a police car
Caller:i need an ambulance
Dispatcher:are youy hurt where are you?
Caller: no i'm fine, i'm in a mother fing phonebooth
Dispatcher:where
Caller: at mother fing _______________
Dispatcher: can youy tell me why you need an ambulance?
Caller: yea i was driving down the road minding my own gd business when a deer hits my car. i thought the gd thing was dead so i but in the backseat of my car. i was driving down the road again when the mother fing deer woke up and wrecked my car
Dispatcher: were you hurt?
Caller: no but then this mfing dog comes out and bites my leg
Dispatcher: ok i can send someone down there immediatly
Caller: hold on the mfing dog is trying to get the deer. #$@% the dogs in the phone booth its biting my ass. aaahhhhh help ahhhh
Dispatcher: ok i'm sending someone over there.
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